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{{Philosophy}}

{{Q|Clearly I '''choose''' to speak this sentence......but then again something '''caused''' me to say that didn't it?|Oscar Wilde|Determinism}}

{{Q|It was the best of [[wikipedia:possible world|possible worlds]], it was the worst of possible worlds.|A determinist, dying.}}

{{Q|Ha! I totally called it!|God, on you reading this page}}

'''Determinism''' is a [[philosophy]] regarding the idea's of predestination and [[free will]]. A determinist believes that every instant in the universe's future has but one possible route it can take (The one it is ''going'' to take). Determinists oppose the idea that a ''true'' free-will is possible because all movement of all matter, including living things, are fated to happen a specific way. To sum it up, they don't think randomness is actually possible because of the laws of cause and effect. Most people are unfimiliar with the concept because most people don't give a shit.

==History of Determinism==

===Invention===

Determinism was invented in 1985 during a murder case in [[Cleveland, Ohio]], when a man named Peter Woodcock pleaded innocent to a 1st degree murder charge on the grounds that he was ''destined'' to kill his wife so there was nothing he could actually do about it. When the prosecuter pointed out that he earlier told the jury he was an [[atheism|atheist]], Woodcock declared that he was 'destined' to kill his wife because of the laws of [[physics]] rather than supernatural forces, and the atheists version of [[destiny]] was born.

===Determinist revivalism movement of the 21st century===

[[Image:300px-Severus_snape.jpg|left|thumb|250px|Determinism and Destiny are like a book (or 'movie' if you're [[American]]), just because you aren't ''aware'' of the fact that Snape is going to kill Dumbledore (who is gay, BTW) doesn't mean it ''isn't'' gonna happen. You see, there is only one possible ending no matter how you try to argue other wise. Oh '''Spoilers''' above, forgot to mention it.]]

The idea of Determinism re-gained popularity in 2001 when the movie [[Donnie Darko]] was released in theaters. People watched it and they were like "yeah exactly, that is how the universe works". They were all eventually huffed by psycho kittens.

Many [[emo|emos]] became fond with the idea, despite knowing nothing about the actual mechanics and functionallity of it, because it gave them some new material for their emo [[poetry]] besides ''being rejected by society'' and ''living in a dark abyss of suffering and pain''(But since the pain was destined to happen; they really can't complain. Then again; they were destined to be emo).

In 2007, another film displaying the idea of determinism (because most humans are too stupid to understand anything that isn't being illustrated on a screen) was released in theaters called "Premonition" starring [[Sandra Bullock|that one chick who is kinda hot sometimes]].

== The D&D Theory ==

99% of all determinists believe that [[God]] is merely a participant (or participants) in an infinitely huge cosmic game of Dungeons and Dragons, rolling a trillion-sided die that decides the path of every aspect of the known universe. The remaining 1% disputes this theory, claiming that the game played is actually Call of [[Cthulhu]].

== Determinism versus Destiny ==

[[Image:Fig6.1.png|right|thumb|300px|Determinist Theory made simple, in flow-chart form.]]

Determinists believe that the universe is deterministic due to things that ''actually'' exist like the laws of physics, where-as proponets of destiny believe the world is determinitic because of ''magical invisable entities'', or [[God]] as they call it.

'''Determinists''' are usually:

* [[geek|Geeky]].

* Spends too much time on the [[internet]].

* Have their 'heads in their ass', so-to-speak.

* [[Led Zepplin]] fans.

* C students.

* Bass players

Proponets of '''Destiny''' are usually:

* [[girl|Girls]]

* Have Lisa Frank folders.

* Watch too much [[Disney]] cartoons.

* Think life is beautiful.

{{Q|God does not play dice with the universe|Einstein|the [[Universe]]}}

==See also==

* Free Will

* [[future|The Future]]

* [[Destiny]]

* [[Philosophy]]

* [[Quantum mechanics|Quantum Mechanics]]

* Ontology

* Cause and Effect

* Your mom

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